- 1 Emotions, behavioral errors and people at the scene of an assault.
- 1.1 Fear
- 1.2 THE EGO
- 1.2.1 Let’s look at the example of the angry motorist:
- 1.2.2 For example, he yells:
- 1.2.3 The right answer at the right time
- 1.2.4 Ex-boyfriend or husband
- 1.2.5 It could be the “capetto” or a gregarious looking for prestige in the eyes of others:
- 1.2.6 As you talk, negotiate, listen to the other, and above all try to move so that you always have only one person in front of you.
- 1.3 Witnesses, the court in the analysis of the context in the assaults
The analysis of the context in the attacks.
The scene of the attack seen with a view to analyzing the context in the assaults and the various implications also legal.
Many people think that aggression as an all-in-a-linear event in its unfolding and its implications where for example:
- One walks down the street, makes a bad encounter, that beats him, robs him and leaves him lying or defends himself and beats the aggressor.
- Or, two guys fight in the street, they come to the hands, one of them stabs the other.
- You’re in the car, you insult each other, you continue for different traffic lights, you get off and you beat yourself, etc.
№!! It’s not like that.
That is why the analysis of the context in aggressions is important to understand.
In fact, this is not the case, because this view does not take into account the fact that aggression is almost never a sudden and random event.
Almost always, in fact, what we know as aggression, in reality is a path made up of ritual stages,where the protagonists play a precise role, actively participating in the final outcome.
This is especially true in all escalations, where in the face of the aggression of one, the other feeds it by behaving aggressively or showing incapable of reacting.
But, whatever the reaction of the future victim, whether he reacts or lets himself be victimized, what happens in those moments?
What scenario is being outlined?
Now you understand the importance of context analysis in aggressions.
Emotions, behavioral errors and people at the scene of an assault.
Wanting to compare the scene to a painting, imagine the worst of medieval paintings where you see spirits, demons and people looking on a canvas, all dancing around the protagonists of the scene.
The first emotion, which is also the most feared and powerful in an aggression is undoubtedly
that surrounds the future victim and from which not even the aggressor is immune, he too feels fear.
The demon of fear is so feared that some people can’t bear to experience this intense and unpleasant emotion, to the point of having “fear of fear”, triggering the paradox of panic attacks.
He also thinks only of people who avoid watching certain movies because they feel that feeling even though they know it’s fiction.
Emotional control in the event of aggression
If you’re thinking about how to defend yourself in a situation of real danger, it’s pointless to think about tactics and strategies if you’re not able to cope with this ubiquitous element that’s alone capable of paralyzing you, making yourself stiff, stammering and consequently making you ineffective and clumsy, making all the techniques you’ve studied in the gym or table ineffective.
Remember that whatever defense or deterrent tactics you want to use will only work if there is a good deal of emotional control at the critical moment.
Losing your temper means losing every chance to resolve the situation positively.
Fear can only manage it because eliminating it is not possible.
On the other hand, fear, and its organic product,adrenaline,are still a resource: thanks to them, the forces are multiplied for the purpose of survival and in the event of an attack it is possible to react in a timely and effective manner.
Unfortunately, in the run-up to an attack, the idea of being injured or killed is fatally made in the mind and this thought is psychologically unbearable and therefore paralyzing for an individual not prepared to face such an event.
This is also why training and experience can provide irreplaceable help to the person in need.
Fear, like all emotions, can be dominated by knowledge and experience.
- Knowing fear, its effects on the body and mind, is the first step if you want to hope to have control of it.
- Knowing how to breathe properly, avoiding wheezing and hyperventilation, or involuntary apnea capable of making us faint.
- To know the negative effects of fear on the cognitive sphere, that is, on the ability to reason (and therefore to manage communication assertively).
- In addition to knowledge, much can be obtained from experience.
In practice, having been afraid several times in one’s life, allows, if you have been able to positively process the experience, to achieve a certain degree of habituation, a kind of “vaccination” from fear itself.
This is why cops and thugs (so much to list two “risk jobs”) seem to react to fear differently from ordinary people, they have gone through a process of strengthening that has made them less sensitive to the “effects” of fear itself, but does not mean that it is eliminated!
There is no immunity to fear.
The other demon often present at the scene of the attacks is the EGO of the people involved.
Several times I have spoken to you as the element that more than any other is responsible for every escalation.
After all, few have, at the critical moment, the lucidity to understand that aggressively responding to aggressive behavior only serves to make things worse.
This is also an effect of fear.
A common reaction in people to react aggressively but which often leads only and quarrel if not even get to the hands for futile reasons or simple misunderstandings that can happen in daily life.
Let’s look at the example of the angry motorist:
he got into a “crook” in traffic and, getting out of the car, comes to you and insults you loudly. In this case, considering one’s own and others’ EGO could be a winning strategy for de-escalation.
Often, offering the other a way out that satisfies his pride (or his vain glory) could be the solution to abort the conflict before it becomes dangerous.
For example, he yells:
“You’re a moron, but do you want to watch when you get out of a crossroads?” at which point you might say, “You’re going to be you! Go easy instead of breaking the c… i!!” or “Calm down, these things happen. Good thing we didn’t do anything about it.”
- In the first case, the answer is clearly in aggressive terms and the next level of escalation is easily imaginable.
- In the second case, the answer is in more assertive terms, of the series that there is no admission of guilt (“they are things that happen”) and a positive solution of the problem is proposed (“less bad that we did nothing”), fully acceptable on the other.
The right answer at the right time
Being able to quickly process appropriate answers,expressed in a calm, uniform tone, not provocative but at the same time firm and determined, represents a skill capable of getting you out of most of the critical issues without physical or psychological damage.
These answers must be prepared and not improvised!
On the other hand, as mentioned above, the possibility of succeeding is mainly given by the ability you have to master fear in those convulsive and frantic moments where tension is high.
It’s not easy.
In any case, keeping in mind the dynamics that involve ego in conflict situations can also be useful in situations other than that seen in the example just now.
Ex-boyfriend or husband
Imagine the case of a woman who meets a potential rapist (perhaps her ex-husband or ex-boyfriend) who makes increasingly persistent and threatening demands for sex.
Instead of reacting with fear or anger, the woman in question could declare her availability but at the same time warn her that she is being treated for a serious or sexually transmitted infectious disease.
Remember, people like to decide!
A closely related aspect of the presence of the EGO of the contenders is the presence on the scene of any friends or accomplices of the attacker.
Regardless of the fact that you are faced with more people, which is more dangerous in themselves, the social role that the person who is harassing you takes over within your group.
It could be the “capetto” or a gregarious looking for prestige in the eyes of others:
the fact of being a bully with you might have a meaning of performance within the pack.
In these conditions, holding assertive behavior (do not offend the other, dialogue on a plane of mutual respect), becomes even more important and more difficult.
While trying to implement de-escalation, further attention should be paid to the postural and physical distance management aspects.
In addition to preventing the other (and others) from getting too close, it is necessary to prevent at all costs the encirclement that would automatically make you victims of a beating.
As you talk, negotiate, listen to the other, and above all try to move so that you always have only one person in front of you.
Try to make sure that the silhouette of the individual you’re talking to is always between you and the rest of the group.
If others fan your way around trying to encircle you, move immediately with all the naturalness you’re capable of, also using what the terrain offers: trees, parked cars, streetlights, everything you need to create obstacles and hinder others.
If you can’t, you just have to fight or run, but if you see them moving, don’t stand still.
One aspect that you have to take into account at the scene of the crime are the possible witnesses and the last almighty spirit that hovers on the Dante scene: the court judge.
Witnesses theoretically should be the decisive element of every crime: present at the scene, they intervene in defense of the victim(not at all one of the most trite recommendations is to attend places where there are people) and then make themselves available to the law, pointing the finger at the wrongdoer, so that Justice triumphs.
The reality is different.
In most cases, as soon as they desperately cry out for help, people will resign, if they can’t do so they will say they haven’t seen and haven’t heard, if they’re forced to testify, it’s absolutely not obvious that they reliably report how the facts really went but give them a distorted interpretation (dangerous at the trial stage).
Disappointing, but as you often see from footage of news events it’s easier for them to make a video that tries to help you or dissuade quarrels or attackers.
Beyond the propensity of a possible witness to get through trouble because of us, there is another fact that you need to take into account:
the witness, in most cases, does not have the skills or the right degree of attention to be able to assess what happened in all its complexity (rituals, decision, body language, preparations).
What does it mean?
Which is likely to say that you beat up the aggressor even though you were defending yourself.
Let’s take an example:
You walk down the street, feel a braking and a crash. You look up and you see two cars stuck inside each other.
You are therefore a witness to the accident. But your focus on what happened is only from the moment of the crash, losing all the circumstances and previous sequences.
The fact that one of the drivers spoke on his mobile phone while behind the wheel, the speed of the two vehicles, perhaps the steering of one of the two drivers to avoid a dog crossing…
The same happens in the case of a brawl or aggression: you hear a noise, shouts, you turn and you see two who give it holy reason.
Who attacked first?
Now, as a witness you have to say who started, if there was a provocative intent on the part of one of the contenders, or one of them tried in every way to calm the other, you understand how what really happened can be distorted by your statements?.
Despite this distorted trust that a witness can give, the courts and the criminal trial continue to consider the testimony as objective evidence, so to understand how to find your fingerprints on a gun.
Now after this chat about context analysis in aggressions, any deterrence or defense technique you’re thinking about adopting you have to take this picture into account, yes I know, you’re worried but you have to be less so than before because now you know the direction to understand!.
Stay Tuned! Context analysis in aggressions.
Street Fight Mentality & Fight Sport