Contents
- 0.1 What is bullying?
- 0.1.1
- 0.1.2 The term refers to the phenomenon as a whole that includes three defined elements and roles:
- 0.1.3 It is possible to distinguish between different types of bullying:
- 0.1.4 Direct bullying is characterized by a direct relationship between victim and bully and in turn can be categorized as:
- 0.1.5 Bullying changes shape based on gender:
- 0.1.6 As for age, there are two different periods:
- 0.1.7
- 0.2 What are the characteristics of bullying?
- 0.3
- 0.4 Cyberbullying what is it?
- 0.5 The role of the parties in bullying
- 0.6
- 0.7 Flankers and spectators
- 0.8 The Victim
- 1
- 2 Some solutions against bullying
- 3 For boys and girls
- 4 Tips for Parents
- 5 Your Son Is Bullying
- 6 Tip for teachers
- 7 Preventing bullying
Bullying consists of repeated physical and psychological aggression perpetrated by one or more people against a victim who is unable to defend himself.
I waited to make this post but I believe that the duty has come to take an interest in this aspect to bring some solutions such as behavior and action to eradicate this sad phenomenon increasingly widespread in various forms, physical, psychological, etc.
It is not only an adolescent phenomenon of human behavior, because in different forms and for different purposes these behaviors are always present in society in other contexts, reasons and different forms such as stalking, mobbing, defamation of reputation, etc.
These are always criminal and violent behaviours that should not be tolerated and justified EVER!
What is bullying?
Bullying is the set of systematic actions of abuse and abuse carried out by a child / adolescent (the “bully”) or by a group of child / adolescent, against another child / adolescent perceived as weaker, the victim of bullying.
So as you can see there is the repetitive feature of the actions, it is not a sporadic episode that can take place between kids!
The term refers to the phenomenon as a whole that includes three defined elements and roles:
- the behaviors of the bully or the bullies, who are the ones who do the bullying and violent actions
- those of the victim, who is the victim who suffers bullying and violence
- and also of those who assist (observers), the accomplices who are those who watch and perhaps laugh by feeding the self-esteem of the bully.
It is possible to distinguish between different types of bullying:
- Direct bullying that is characterized by explicit attacks against the victim and can be of a physical or verbal type.
- Indirect bullying that harms the victim in his relationships with other people, through acts such as exclusion from the peer group, isolation, the spread of gossip and slander on his account, the damage of his friendships.
- Cyber bullying, when bullying actions occur through the Internet (email, social networks, chats, blogs, forums), or through the mobile phone.
Direct bullying is characterized by a direct relationship between victim and bully and in turn can be categorized as:
- Physical bullying: the bully hits the victim with blows, kicks, shoves, spits or sexually harasses her;
- Verbal bullying: the bully teases the victim, frequently telling her bad and unpleasant things or calling her by offensive names, unpleasant or threatening her, saying most of the time profanities and rudeness;
- Psychological bullying: the bully ignores or excludes the victim completely from his group or makes fun of false rumors about his account;
- Cyber-bullying or electronic bullying: The bully sends harassing messages to the victim via SMS or chat or the photographer/film at times when he does not wish to be filmed and then sends his images to others to defame him, threaten or annoy him.
Indirect bullying is less visible than direct bullying, but no less dangerous, and tends to harm the victim in his relationships with other people, excluding and isolating her through psychological bullying and therefore with gossip and defamation on his account.
Bullying changes shape based on gender:
- male bullies are more prone to direct bullying,
- while females to the indirect one.
Males in particular are more likely to approach force, while females prefer gossip and defamation.
As for age, there are two different periods:
- The first between 8 and 14 years of age,
- whereas the second between 14 and 18,
Bullying, therefore, varies from a simple relationship between couples to a hierarchy of bullies who support and act with active and passive roles such as those who assist without doing and saying anything.
What are the characteristics of bullying?
- the protagonists are always children or teens,usually of school age, who share the same context, more commonly the school;
- bullying, harassment or assault is intentional,i.e. they are carried out by the bully (or bullies) to cause harm to the victim or for fun;
- there is persistence over time: the actions of bullies last over time, for weeks, months or years and are repeated;
- there is asymmetry in the relationship,that is, an imbalance of power between those who carry out the action and those who suffer it, for example for reasons of age, strength, gender and the popularity that the bully has in the group of his peers;
- the victim is unable to defend herself,is isolated and is afraid to report bullying because she fears revenge
- a joke: in the joke the intent is to have fun all together, not to hurt the other;
- a conflict between peers: conflict, as a quarrel can be, is episodic, takes place in certain circumstances and can happen to anyone, within the framework of an equal relationship between the boys involved.
The great emphasis on the phenomenon that the mass media have given in recent years has brought attention to the phenomenon of bullying.
Unfortunately, it only happened after serious news episodes linked to episodes of serious violence and suicides somehow induced by the bully and the herd that followed him.
Unfortunately, however, when you hear how the subject and language used by people is addressed, it’s often about thoughts or opinions about bullying that are essentially wrong.
- believe that it is only a phenomenon related to the period of growth of children;
- to think that she is a simple “girl”;
- to assume that only the poorest and most backward housing areas are found (a hypothesis that has proved to be false and useless, sometimes, affluent children, persecute poorer children)
- judge the victim as if he is guilty only to be able to defend himself.
- think they’re minor things
- Etc.
To combat bullying, it is of paramount importance that the public recognizes the seriousness of bullying and their consequences for the recovery of both the small victims, who suffer deep suffering, and their own abusers, who run the risk of taking paths characterized by deviance and delinquency.
The same applies to bullying, stalking, non-nism, etc. therefore in schools, in work, on the internet, in barracks, in prisons, etc. not to mention particular cases such as homophobia, with especially verbal and derogatory actions, especially in environments dominated by stereotypes and prejudices against gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transsexuals, towards the disabled for their condition and finally but not least on animals who are often victims of abuse. Human.
Cyberbullying what is it?
The Internet has opened up new possibilities for all of us including criminals, paedophiles, scammers, disturbed people, etc. including bullies.
This other side of the coin is therefore well represented by the risks associated with the misuse of this tool.
Among these various crimes and dangerous behaviors is cyberbullying.
Virtual is real! Today some virtual tools are really so “close to us” constantly to influence reality.
It can be called cyberbullying the use of new technologies to intimidate, harass, embarrass, make other people feel uncomfortable or exclude.
- Phone calls
- Messages (with or without images)
- Synchronous chat
- Social networks (for example, Facebook)
- Q&A sites
- Online gaming sites
- Online forums
- Etc.
- Gossip spread through messages on mobile phones, mails, social networks;
- posting or forwarding embarrassing information, images or videos (including fake ones);
- stealing the identity and profile of others, or building fakes,in order to embarrass or damage the reputation of the victim;
- insulting or mocking the victim through messages on mobile phone, mail, social networks, blogs or other media;
- making physical threats to the victim through any media.
These are both crimes that should not be justified!
The role of the parties in bullying
The bully and/or the instigator
Bullo derives from the bully English that in the Oxford Dictionary, the English dictionary indicates that it is a person who uses his own strength or power to intimidate a weaker person.
The bully is a person who uses his strength or position of superiority to hurt someone else in a physical, verbal or psychological way.
The term bully refers to a boy or child who targets a peer and every day, for a long time, “bullying”, that is, he puts in place violence of various kinds against him to which he can not defend himself.
The bully is a person who hurts according to a characteristic scheme:
- Intentional: Bullies are meant to hurt and feel satisfaction in doing harm.
- Persistent: The bully every day, for a long time persecutes the victim
- In addition, the bully is stronger than the victim (he has more “power” or influence, popularity) and the target is isolated.
The bully stands out in the dominant bully and the flanker.
Dominant bully or bully:
The bully has a strong need for power, to dominate others, to feel good about himself and to appear strong.
Feel satisfaction in subduing and humiliating others.
He is an irascible, impulsive boy unable to control emotions and impulses. He has aggressive behavior and sees violence as a way to show his strength and be recognized and respected.
He wants to get attention and popularity in the group.
It is often a person who has a certain influence on others, assuming the role of “leader” that also instigates companions to misres treat the victim or ignore it.
Especially the bullies manage to manipulate others so as to use situations to their advantage.
Bullies use deception, they lie, saying they didn’t do anything wrong.
They make the victim feel guilty and establish false friendships with others based on domination.
The bully can use different forms of violence:
Physical bullying, the bully uses kicks, punches, slaps, shoves, pinches. Pushing, scratching, making legs, pushing are all forms of physical bullying even the most “light” acts. The bully steals personal items, mistreats them, hides and breaks. Example: A boy is assaulted every day on his way out of school, pushed and beaten by his classmates while other boys see and film the scene with mobile phones, posting the video online (cyber bullying)
Verbal bullying, the bully uses threats, derision, insults, insults, nicknames. He teased, racist/homophobic words. It targets someone for a physical defect, because they are foreign or somehow “different” from the group. Example: A girl teases her classmate every day for the way she dresses and tells her that she is ugly, convincing the whole class to stay away from her.
Indirect bullying or even female bullying because it is widespread among girls): In indirect bullying there is no contact between the victim and the bully. Those targeted are: isolated, marginalized and spoken badly behind. He is not invited to parties, excluded in team games and group outings. He also receives glances, smiles and malignant giggles.
Example of bullies: a bully targets a girl, excludes her from the group. The victim is alone in class, no one speaks to her or wants to sit next to her. She is not invited to any group activities. Also as soon as she enters class, she hears everyone laughing, talking to each other in her ear, and she knows they’re talking bad about her. She hears whispering nastiness, there are bad gossip about her in class. If he approaches the others, they walk away because he is “not part of the group”.
Why is he a bully?
Bullies behave like this for various reasons.
Possible causes are related to family, personal, social and group factors. Here are the main reasons why a guy might be a bully.
School factors:
- Bullying arises within a group.
- The bully wants to assert himself, be recognized and be followed by others.
- He wants to dominate others and feel important.
- Gregarious bullies in turn are complicit because they want to be part of the group and not to be excluded.
- In addition, bullying is seen as something fun to do as a group.
Social factors:
- Bullies have been influenced by aggressive “models”, in real life but also watching movies, violent videos.
- Children and adolescents, who witness many episodes of violence in front of television or film, often become more aggressive and show less empathy towards the victims of aggression.
- The media can, to some extent, increase the extent of the phenomenon.
- Being bullied is consistent with the powerful or harsh image; it is a stereotype that is widespread especially among males, but increasingly also in females.
Other causes:
Out of boredom: Lack of stimulation, dissatisfaction, monotony sometimes pushes children to find stimuli in these behaviors.
The charm of power, feeling strong, superior: the desire for attention, feeling accepted and respected by others so that they can be better off with themselves. The bully needs to attract attention, establish his power and be supported by the group and accepted
The charm of the domain: The bully behaves like this because he needs to dominate others and submit him attracted by the “charm” of violence.
The pleasure of making people suffer: Some people feel pleasure in seeing each other suffer, they derive satisfaction and enjoyment.
Intolerance towards the different: One of the most frequent motivations in bullying is intolerance towards those who are perceived as different, without doing us anything wrong, for the mere fact of being different: the homosexual, the foreigner (not only understood as a different nationality, but also different country, different region, north and south etc.).
Some psychological implications that have been analyzed in bullies
Adults who abuse their personality, who have an authoritative attitude, combined with the need to control their surroundings, also have a greater tendency to underestimate their victims.
Research developments have shown that factors such as envy and resentment can be indicators of risk to become a bully.
The results on self-esteem, in particular, are controversial where while some highlight a narcissistic aspect, others show shame or embarrassment.
In some cases the origin of bullying is rooted in childhood, perhaps by those who have been abused.
There is evidence to suggest that bullies are much more likely to have problems with justice, and that they can structure themselves as an adult into a real criminal career.
Flankers and spectators
Although most of those present are not directly involved in actively acting as a bully, there are a number of people who intervene in the affair anyway.
These individuals are so-called “spectators” and unfortunately tend to take the bully’s parts.
In 85 of the cases, spectators are involved in denigration of the victim or in the consolation of the bully.
In most cases, however, the waiters do nothing that would worry either the victim or the aggressor, at least until the bully gets fed up with having people around for not having witnesses, driving away everyone he doesn’t trust.
The semi-bully or flanker is a usually insecure boy, who gets carried away by the leader and has the role of aide or supporter because this behavior can give him an identity and can assert himself within the group. The gregarious bully, if he plays the role of “supporter” he mocks the victim, laughs, incites the bully, attracts the attention of other companions or simply stands by.
There are a number of reasons why flankers and spectators do not intervene, ranging from:
- afraid to become victims themselves,
- to the different perception of injustices that occur in the course of life,
- territorial culture of doing their own in the group,
- sadistic and fun complacency
Often bullying has the very characteristic of happening in front of the presence of a large group of spectators as well as the flankers.
In some cases, thanks to his charisma or authority in the group, the bully manages to create an aura of suggestion that allows him to win the favor of the spectators and strengthen his self-esteem as a leader even outside the very group to which he belongs.
These dynamics are often also linked to the phenomenon “baby gang” an increasingly widespread and worrying phenomenon that leads the herd to make heinous crimes despite the young age.
Unless significant events occur in the early part of a gang’slife, there is a risk that the “deviant mentality” will gradually become more and more in the consciences of the flankers that also negatively affects the rest of the school.
In some groups where this mentality has gripped, abuse and injustice become a common denominator within the context of reference, leading even the flankers to become bullies.
If you leave room for these gang behaviors the risk is that you create more criminal mentality changes supported by the group that take a long time to be eradicated, with resources and coordination with social services as well as taking the risk of having a group of diverted and criminal subjects moving among students.
A key aspect to prevent and stem the phenomenon of bullying is essential to “work in advance” precisely on the observers (“the silent majority”), who are aware of the situation, but most of the time do not intervene in defense of the victim.
Indifference is a way to make the bully even more bully, he must know that he is wrong and that you do not agree.
The Victim
- the victim’s ability to ignore the aggressor’s taunts,
- or to play the game in peer communication processes,
- the ability to intimidate or react physically to an aggressive provocation or action.
As always, offenders do not tend to do a crime with a strong person or who can react.
While to an un careful and superficial viewer the chronic bullying of a person or group of people can appear as a simple act of aggression perpetrated on random victims the cycle of reactivating bullying demonstrates the opposite.
Bullying is triggered when the provocation and the bullying occurs an inadequate response by the victim towards the aggressor.
This inappropriate response of the victim is seen as stimulating by the bully who finds the outlet to his deviant behavior and becomes an incentive to do it again every time.
Also for this is the repetitiveness of bullying towards the same or the same subjects.
Some solutions against bullying
Now apart from knowing the phenomenon of bullying what matters is providing suggestions of action and behavior for children, parents and professors.
These are a number of legal tips!
Let’s repeat a moment in summary what is bullying?
Bullying means being bad or offensive by going so far as to scare or hurt another person.
Bullying can occur anywhere and take various forms, ranging from spreading false rumors to posting inappropriate photos, to threatening someone
Bullying has the characteristic of being repetitive, it is not an isolated event.
Whether you’re being bullied, having a friend who is a victim of it, or who has been accused of it, remember that you can always find help and that you never have to think that you are alone.
Now an important premise to distinguish between those who are a bully boy because he has lost his way a little despite the fact that behind there is a good family from those who live in a context of social hardship with a family of thugs.
To avoid further problems contact the relevant authorities immediately to seek advice.
This is to avoid retaliation and further discussions with threats or other towards the victim’s family, teachers, etc.
For boys and girls
Do you feel bullied?
Remember that you never have to feel guilty about this, it’s not your fault and that it can happen to anyone.
Bullying might make you feel uncomfortable or just, but you’re not enough to talk about it with people you trust.
Remember that you are not alone and you need to talk about it right away with someone you trust and help you get through the situation.
You must never tolerate bullying and no one should suffer it in indifference.
So talk to someone you trust right now.
You have to keep calm
- Take deep breaths and relax because you have to think that he is the right person to contact and what to say. To do this you have to be calm and relaxed to make the best possible decision and tell the facts calmly and accurately.
- Do not approach the person who has been bullied when you are not quiet but are agitated, upset, etc.
Talk to someone you trust right now
- If you’ve received threats or you’re concerned about your security, contact someone you trust right away.
- Contact a close friend, family member, teacher, or even the authorities.
Make sure you’re in a safe place
- Don’t risk being alone with someone you don’t feel safe with.
- If you talk to this person about what happened, use simple, direct language and stay calm but don’t do it in an isolated place.
Don’t react
- Do not try to take revenge or humiliate the person who has bullied you.
- Don’t do or say something you might regret.
- You risk going from wrong to reason and making it appear in the eyes of others who do not know the facts that you were not the victim of bullying
A friend of yours is being bullied
If you have a friend or you see someone who is being bullied, you have to help them, it is right that you help them.
Research that has emerged analysing the various cases has shown that when you help someone who is being bullied, the bully will be stopped.
Don’t be indifferent!
Also the more people you are helping, the greater the ability to stop the bully.
Decide to help him and act
- If your friend is in danger, think about how you can help him.
- Before offering help to your friend think to be effective in your reasoning and ask for advice but to help him, do not believe who tells you his own.
- If trying to help him alone makes you anxious, ask a person you trust for help. Everyone’s safety is the priority.
Work with your friend to find a solution
- Tell your friend that he can count on you, that he is not alone and you want to help him manage the situation.
- Remind your friend that it is not his fault and that he has done nothing to deserve this treatment and that no one should be bullied.
- Convince him never to be alone with the person or people who bully him.
- Try to help him avoid making the situation worse or reacting aggressively, which can be deleterious.
- Don’t speak for your friend unless you’re asked.
Spend time with your friend
- Try to spend time with your friend so that he feels your support and ask other friends to do the same.
- Keep making yourself feel so that you know you always care about us both in person and with messages.
- Engage him in your group of friends.
If they called you a bully
Bullying is always wrong but sometimes some behaviors can be misunderstood or what has happened is extreme.
It is important and essential to always defend one’s reputation.
It happens to everyone or you have happened to make fun of someone for different reasons but no matter what a person says or does, the way you behave always depends on you.
Again, it is always man understood as a human being who makes a difference!
Remember that you can’t know or predict what can hurt someone emotionally, so it’s best not to take risks in making certain observations or statements.
Apologize!!
- If someone feels hurt by your words or actions, it is important that you sincerely apologize and no longer repeat this action or statement that has affected that person’s sensitivity.
- If you’re afraid or uncomfortable with how to apologize or rebuild your relationship, seek advice from a trusted friend or adult.
- If you don’t understand why the things you said hurt someone because it didn’t seem so important to you, apologize and ask the person in question for explanations. Tell the person you understand and that you will pay more attention, reassure them that the situation will not repeat itself.
Tips for Parents
The first step in helping your child is to be a good listener and no one knows your child better than you, and if you’re a good parent, you’re a point of reference for them when you’re in trouble.
Here are some general tips and strategies that can help you manage the bullying issues that are statistically reported most frequently.
Your Son Is Bullied
Get ready for an effective conversation
- Take your son seriously and listen to him.
- Never underestimate what he tells you.
- Find the right place to talk about it.
- Try to keep calm and support a positive conversation.
- Don’t ever blame him.
- Ask for advice if you don’t know what to do to professionals, don’t improvise.
Talk about the problem with him
Offer your support:
- Prove yourself a good listener, stay silent and don’t interrupt it, don’t put words in your child’s mouth and don’t jump to conclusions.
- Use a calm, even tone throughout the conversation. Avoid using harsh or accusatory language, which could cause your child to shut up or feel even more embarrassed.
- Avoid judging or criticizing your behavior prior to the bullying case.
- Don’t blame your son for being bullied.
- Don’t make promises you can’t keep, but reassure your child that you want to help him find an effective solution to the problem.
Show empathy:
- If you yourself have been bullied, talk about your experience with your child.
- Identifying yourself in your child’s situation will encourage him to share what happened and how he feels about it.
If your child shows signs of psychological distress or self-harm tendencies, ask for help immediately. Don’t leave your son alone.
Develop an action plan
- Ask your child what he wants to do and how you can help him.
- Give him more than one chance on how to handle the situation. Don’t decide for yourself, but propose solutions and encourage them to find ways to handle the situation. Your child must believe and feel that he is part of the plan of action for it to work.
- If it’s a serious situation (e.g. someone is threatening your child), take immediate action. If it’s someone in your child’s school, talk to a counselor or the principal. Your child’s safety is the priority.
- If the person uses an online service to annoy your child, report the content to the online service provider. You can report offensive content on many sites and services.
Your Son Is Bullying
Get ready for an effective conversation
- Take your son seriously and listen to him. You’ll probably have opinions about what happened, especially if your child has let you down by behaving badly. However, it is important that you do not express these views critically.
- Find the right place to talk about it.
- Try to keep calm and support a positive conversation.
Talk about the problem
- Your child needs to feel that he can speak openly and honestly. Don’t interrupt or criticize him, but let him tell the whole story. Tell him that you will find a solution to the problem together. Even if your child’s behavior has disappointed you, avoid judging him but explain to him that this is a serious situation.
Find out what happened:
- Find out exactly what happened and how long the situation has been going on. When you ask for clarification, prove yourself a good listener so you can get as much information as possible. Find out if it’s new behavior for your child or if it’s a recurring attitude you didn’t know about.
Transmit your values:
- Tell your child that bullying is unacceptable and that he will have to accept the consequences. Remind your child of the importance of kindness, respect, and empathy.
Analyze the best possible solutions to the problem
Decide what the consequences will be:
- Tell your child that those who misbehave with or hurt others face consequences. Show resolve and consistency.
Invite your child to apologize:
- Help your child write his apology or choose the right words to apologise in a voice.
Consider these recommended solutions:
- If the bullying case occurred online, ask your child to remove the posts. If it occurred at school, let the principal know and explain how you’re coping with your child. You offer to work with the school on the consequences of the law.
Tip for teachers
With these tips I hope to provide you with some useful information to allow you to help students involved in bullying situations:
- When to talk to them,
- where to talk to them,
- what to say exactly and
- what to think about to intervene at a later date.
Here are some general tips and strategies to help you create and implement school regulations, promote a positive climate in the classroom, and prevent bullying.
The message that must pass is to pay attention to the phenomenon and that the transgression of school principles and norms in this regard will not be tolerated.
Sensitize your parents too!
It must be clear what behaviour is wrong to avoid misunderstandings and hypocritical justifications on the part of pupils and parents.
A student of yours is being bullied
Get ready for an effective conversation
- Take your student seriously and listen to him.
- Find the right place to talk about it.
- Try to keep calm and support a positive conversation.
- Be sure to speak to the student as soon as possible after the incident has occurred.
Talk about the problem
Offer your support:
- Prove yourself a good listener, don’t put words in your student’s mouth and don’t jump to conclusions.
- Use a calm, even tone throughout the conversation. Avoid using harsh or accusatory language, which could cause the student to quit or feel even more embarrassed.
- Avoid judging or criticizing your behavior prior to the bullying case.
- Don’t blame your student for being bullied.
- Don’t make promises you can’t keep, but reassure your student that you want to help them find an effective solution to the problem.
Urgent and serious situations:
- If the student is given physical threats, tell them that you will do anything to protect him. Contact the appropriate authoritative figure within the school, if necessary: do not take matters into your own hands.
Show empathy:
- If you’ve been bullied, talk about your experience with the student.
- Identifying yourself in your student’s situation will encourage them to share what happened and how they feel about it.
Get to the bottom of the matter:
- Speak separately with everyone involved, including the student, the person accused of bullying and any witnesses.
- Provide ongoing assistance to all parties involved.
- Ask other school staff members, such as a social worker, psychologist, or principal, to help you report or manage the episode.
If your student is upset or showing signs of self-harm, don’t leave him alone and ask for help right away.
Develop an action plan
- Based on the information that emerged from the conversation with the student, decide the next steps.
- If you and the student feel that the situation is not so serious and it is not necessary to exaggerate it, still offer your help.
- Beware, if this is a serious incident that you need to report, explain to the student the school’s regulations and help them report the situation.
- Mediation, if you think the bully and the student are talking, you can arrange a clarification between them as a mediator.
- If you believe the student may be in danger of physical assault, contact the authorities or the principal immediately.
Dig deeper
- Check how your student is both physically and psychologically.
- Do not deal with the issue alone but consult with other teachers and specialists
- Ask the student if the situation has been resolved and if he feels comfortable at school.
- Make sure students are aware of what behaviors are allowed in the classroom.
- Promote positive relationships and consider passing on conflict resolution skills to students.
- He talks about the phenomenon at school periodically (this approach should not only be about the issue of bullying but about all the problematic issues in society).
A student of yours is bullied
Get ready for an effective conversation
- Take your student seriously and listen to him.
- Find the right place to talk about it.
- Try to keep calm and support a positive conversation.
Talk about the problem
Offer your support.
- Prove yourself a good listener, don’t put words in your student’s mouth and don’t jump to conclusions.
- Use a calm, even tone throughout the conversation. Avoid using harsh or accusatory language, which could cause the student to quit or feel even more embarrassed.
- Avoid judging or criticizing your behavior prior to the bullying case.
- Don’t make promises you can’t keep, but reassure your student that you want to help them find an effective solution to the problem.
Go to the bottom of the matter.
- Find out exactly what happened, how far the situation goes and whether what happened after the incident was reported.
- Speak separately with everyone involved, including the student, the person accused of bullying and any witnesses.
- Provide ongoing assistance to all parties involved.
- Ask other school staff members, such as a social worker, psychologist, or principal, to help you report or manage the episode.
Communicates the school’s regulations.
- Tell the student that bullying is unacceptable and that he will have to accept the consequences.
- If only one event is repeated, it will be reported to the relevant authorities.
Develop an action plan
- Based on the information from the conversation with students, decide the next steps.
- If you feel that it is not necessary to report the incident, work with the student on the best way to apologize.
- If it is necessary to report the incident, take all necessary measures to ensure that all parties are safe. Engage parents by complying with school regulations.
- If for some reason you believe a student is in danger, report the incident immediately to an authoritative figure at the school. Make sure that the bullied student, the culprit and any witnesses are safe until the situation is handled by the relevant authorities.
Dig deeper
- Ask the student how he is, if the situation has been resolved, if he feels comfortable at school and what his relationship with other people is like.
- Make sure the student has people to ask for help. He could also benefit from a few meetings with a school counselor.
- It may also be useful to ask the student’s parents for information. Find out if you can help the student in other ways, such as engaging them in community activities.
- To prevent bullying in your classroom, make sure students are aware of what behaviors are allowed. Promote positive relationships and consider passing on conflict resolution skills to students.
Preventing bullying
As with many aspects of life and self-defense, prevention is always one of the best strategies to adopt.
For this reason, it is necessary to adopt clear behaviors and regulations in order to block in the bud even such incidents.
Prevent bullying at school
- It makes it clear to students, parents and staff that bullying is unacceptable and has consequences.
- Encourage students to come forward if they are aware of bullying cases.
- Use any opportunity to talk about bullying students (e.g. in literature classes and casual conversations).
Remind students to ask for help
- Tell students that they can trust you, that you will listen to their concerns about bullying and take them seriously to help them solve the problem.
- Informs students that the school has adopted regulations to ensure everyone’s serenity. These regulations have specific consequences for bullying.
Get along with students on the basic rules
- If I find out that someone is being bullied or offended, I will tell an adult.
- I will treat people online with the same respect that I reserve for them.
- I will not post photos or videos of other people with the intent to embarrass or humiliate them.
Create safety regulations at school
- Experts recommend drafting safety regulations in all schools, including regulations to prevent bullying.
- Clearly define the concepts of bullying, bullying and intimidation, and introduce procedures to ensure the safety and protection of the bullied student.
- Use an anonymous reporting system to allow students and teachers to feel safe when reporting bullying cases.
- Develop a formal procedure for analyzing bullying incidents, including the consequences, and make it available to students.
- Become familiar with situations where the school may intervene in the case of bullying, such as if a student has violated the school’s resource use policy by using them for bullying or if incidents that take place outside the school adversely affect the climate at school. If you can’t apply school regulations to the episode, consider informing the parents of the students involved.
Develop a web security education program at your school for students, teachers, and staff
The program should include information on the following topics:
- Use computers and the Internet securely
- Password protection and other security tips
- Responsible use of the Internet
- Preventing bullying
- Legislation and crimes.
Conclusions
Stop the bullying!
Today there are many structures and associations that can help you on this issue.
Never try to deal with this problem alone and above all do not pass time but act immediately because it is a type of crime that tends to have an escalation of the crime.
Several anti-bullying prevention platforms have been developed and having resources for children, parents and teachers seeking support and help with issues related to bullying events and other conflicts is important.
I repeat that these are not issues to be addressed alone!
In addition to the ability to engage with people with experience about the phenomenon, it offers detailed programs, including guidance on how to start important conversations for people who are bullied, parents whose children have been bullied or bullied, and teachers who have had students involved in bullying.
Stay Tuned! Bullying is not a game but a crime!
Andrea